nat and i talked about our wedding plans and i think we finally figured out what we are going to do...and basically it all boiled down to terminology."
ill write about that later
and etta, surgery went great...she will have to go back in 2 weeks to get stitches out.
later loves
Saturday, January 28, 2006
Friday, January 27, 2006
My baby got hit by a car
ill tell you the story later...but she is ok. SHe has surgery tomorrow to stitch up her leg...going to missouri tomorrow...will write on sunday and monday what happened.
love you
chrissi
Saturday, January 21, 2006
poker night and everything else
ever since i got to tremont, we have poker nights at one of nat's friends house. Its $20 for poker, pizza, fun and beer (i am glad no one is irresponsible in that regard, its a mature crowd). I go, have some fun and hope that nat wins the big pot. last night i was fantastic. out of 24 people i made 4th place, and won $35! Hey better than nothing. i think i could've gone all the way, but one of my last hands wiped me out. it was tons of fun! i have a feeling its goin to be a slow weekend. I have lots of work to do that i dont really want to do. I have to decide if i can go to arkansas next week...I have been getting alot more work and i fear that if i go i will lose out on some cash, yet in a sense it is a business venture (sarah is going to help me with my websites) and it would be better than sitting around here without nat around. we are going to branson missouri regardless and arkansas is only 3 hour drive to sarah. I also would have to take my laptop, which tends to slow my work down because it takes a bit for it to recongnize what i am doing (but it is better). I dunno what to do. I hate to board the dogs in a kennel...but i can only hope that it would help potty train them! OH that is so frustrating! I would like to have people over and play cards and have dinner but i cant bring myself to invite people into a house that smells like urine and poop. We did clean the carpet on monday while they were at the clinic, and it definately helped, but its like outside is to play, inside is to potty. anyone have any suggestions? i am going to start beating them!
Work is going well. I have been busy this week with a couple different projects, i hope to get them all done this weekend so i can start new ones on monday. So its getting better, and i am getting better. i still have a long way to go, but i am at least making progress daily. Levi is talking about flying me down again for training. I learn alot more when i am down there, but dread spending the week at his house. its ALL work, and no play, very boring i must say. I guess i have to if he wants me to though. I feel better about making him put out the cash because 1. i know he is making it 2. i know i am helping him make it. 3. it will be better to see hands on than from afar. all in good time.
i think i decided for the bachlorette party to paint pottery. I think there is a place in old mason but am not sure. also, does anyone have any friends that just got married and still have their decorations? id rather not go buy them, id rather just borrow them.
The wedding plans are coming along nicely. I have been horrible about the losing weight aspect. I try not to get mad at myself and make it worse, but to actually get into gear. Apparently i dont want it that bad! I see myself falling into trends that if i dont stop them now, i will have to deal with for the rest of my life. i found my dress and it is beautiful. i think its exactly what i was looking for.
I NEED ADDRESSES!!! One person has sent me their address. Please dont assume i have it becasue i sent you something in the mail...i lost my address book so i have none, except for becky because she actually sent me hers! (alycepaige@yahoo.com) I really cant do anything without them.
for the ceremony and reception i need the following volunteers
1. Set up at ceremony
2. Break down at ceremony
3. Decorate for Reception
4. Organize bachlorette party
5. Break down decorations at reception
6. photographers
7. video cameras (and someone/persons to man them)
8. advice on how to do the ceremony
9. Organize Personal Shower
10. Alter my dress (once i get it)
11. I am sure there is something i am missing
I want you (katie, becky, sarah r, cindy, kadie, sarah c, amber, carol, cheryl, moms, emma, jen(ny), danielle, nessa, abbi and steph, etc etc) to help and be apart, but I dont want to assign duties because i want you to do it out of your own generous heart, not because you feel obligated.
I could have more than one party, honestly i dont know how to plan a wedding or pre-wedding stuff. someone was saying that personal showers are for "personal stuff" from friends...so pampered chef party? I dont know what i am doing...some have you all have been married...any ideas? i want to be able to have as many parties in cinci as possible (gives me an excuse to coem down and see you guys).
i am letting ruth ann take care of most everything here, and probably nats mom will help too, and ken aka "dad".
i love you all, please dont ever doubt that. regardless of how much we talk or dont talk, everyone of you is dear dear dear to my spirit (to spirit because the heart is fickle, you all are sewn into my very being!!)
anyway, i need to get some work done. call me...
later
c.ALIce
Work is going well. I have been busy this week with a couple different projects, i hope to get them all done this weekend so i can start new ones on monday. So its getting better, and i am getting better. i still have a long way to go, but i am at least making progress daily. Levi is talking about flying me down again for training. I learn alot more when i am down there, but dread spending the week at his house. its ALL work, and no play, very boring i must say. I guess i have to if he wants me to though. I feel better about making him put out the cash because 1. i know he is making it 2. i know i am helping him make it. 3. it will be better to see hands on than from afar. all in good time.
i think i decided for the bachlorette party to paint pottery. I think there is a place in old mason but am not sure. also, does anyone have any friends that just got married and still have their decorations? id rather not go buy them, id rather just borrow them.
The wedding plans are coming along nicely. I have been horrible about the losing weight aspect. I try not to get mad at myself and make it worse, but to actually get into gear. Apparently i dont want it that bad! I see myself falling into trends that if i dont stop them now, i will have to deal with for the rest of my life. i found my dress and it is beautiful. i think its exactly what i was looking for.
I NEED ADDRESSES!!! One person has sent me their address. Please dont assume i have it becasue i sent you something in the mail...i lost my address book so i have none, except for becky because she actually sent me hers! (alycepaige@yahoo.com) I really cant do anything without them.
for the ceremony and reception i need the following volunteers
1. Set up at ceremony
2. Break down at ceremony
3. Decorate for Reception
4. Organize bachlorette party
5. Break down decorations at reception
6. photographers
7. video cameras (and someone/persons to man them)
8. advice on how to do the ceremony
9. Organize Personal Shower
10. Alter my dress (once i get it)
11. I am sure there is something i am missing
I want you (katie, becky, sarah r, cindy, kadie, sarah c, amber, carol, cheryl, moms, emma, jen(ny), danielle, nessa, abbi and steph, etc etc) to help and be apart, but I dont want to assign duties because i want you to do it out of your own generous heart, not because you feel obligated.
I could have more than one party, honestly i dont know how to plan a wedding or pre-wedding stuff. someone was saying that personal showers are for "personal stuff" from friends...so pampered chef party? I dont know what i am doing...some have you all have been married...any ideas? i want to be able to have as many parties in cinci as possible (gives me an excuse to coem down and see you guys).
i am letting ruth ann take care of most everything here, and probably nats mom will help too, and ken aka "dad".
i love you all, please dont ever doubt that. regardless of how much we talk or dont talk, everyone of you is dear dear dear to my spirit (to spirit because the heart is fickle, you all are sewn into my very being!!)
anyway, i need to get some work done. call me...
later
c.ALIce
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
today
yesterday we finally got the girls home. 2 days without them were very lonely. I am glad to have them back, even if its just to lay around and sleep. They are not supposed to play much, and honestly i dont think they have the energy. I am scared to pick them up and play with them, that i might hurt them. I guess being dogs though, they are resilent.
last night i went to paint pottery with nat's mom. I thought that might be a cute idea for my bacholorette party. Get teh girls together, go out to dinner (or take sandwiches to pottery place) and have each of my friends make me a small plate for my kitchen. Cindy gave me an idea to go to a spa, but i am not sure that many people can afford the $150. Id like to make it where we can spend some quality time together and have some fun. maybe go dancing or something afterwards...harmless fun!
i have decided, in a effort to help cheryls pampered chef business, that i am going to do a pampered chef personal shower. I dunno how that is supposed to work, and i am not sure thats what i am supposed to do. But hey, stuff for the kitchen, and being that i am really starting to love to cook..why not. plus its two birds with one stone.
If you have any other ideas, let me know. Please keep the days open because i would love for all my friends to come (near and far).
tonight we have dinner with ruth ann and mike. it should be fun. I like them. They are nats cousins (mike, his wife).
anyway, i gotta get back to work
love ya
last night i went to paint pottery with nat's mom. I thought that might be a cute idea for my bacholorette party. Get teh girls together, go out to dinner (or take sandwiches to pottery place) and have each of my friends make me a small plate for my kitchen. Cindy gave me an idea to go to a spa, but i am not sure that many people can afford the $150. Id like to make it where we can spend some quality time together and have some fun. maybe go dancing or something afterwards...harmless fun!
i have decided, in a effort to help cheryls pampered chef business, that i am going to do a pampered chef personal shower. I dunno how that is supposed to work, and i am not sure thats what i am supposed to do. But hey, stuff for the kitchen, and being that i am really starting to love to cook..why not. plus its two birds with one stone.
If you have any other ideas, let me know. Please keep the days open because i would love for all my friends to come (near and far).
tonight we have dinner with ruth ann and mike. it should be fun. I like them. They are nats cousins (mike, his wife).
anyway, i gotta get back to work
love ya
Monday, January 16, 2006
my little girls
Etta and Sadie went today to get spayed. I miss the little babes. They have been fighting alot lately, within the last week it has really escalated. Sadie sleeps behind the bed and cant stand to be near Etta. Yet sometimes they are perfectly fine. I am not really sure who to blame, honestly i think they are both at fault. If it continues, we might be forced to give one away. Etta was my birthday present and my dog, Sadie, well Nat is in love with her and claims her undoubtably. I hope it doesnt have to come down to having to give one up. It breaks my heart to see them fight, and i miss them terribly today while they are away. I dont want to give them up. I was thinking, if we had children, and they fought all the time, would you put one up for adoption...doubtful. And they are out little girls...i dont want to be put in a position to make that decision. Hopefully the spaying will help and not make it worse.
Other side of life. Work is going well. Last week I finally got to a point where I was making acceptable progress and money. Hard work none the less, but rewarding with a nice paycheck.
Nat is wonderful
Wedding plans are somewhat stressful. I felt trapped that i had to do it a certain way in order to make everyone happy, once i put that aside and decided what i wanted, its a lot less of a headache. I do need addresses though..everyones!!! so email them to me. (alycepaige@yahoo.com)...I gotta get on the ball with invitation design and getting everything ready. The date is May 20th, reception at cheryls house in monroe, and somewhat of a black tie affair (not prom dresses and tuxedos, but nice dresses and suits)..thats the plan anyway. So please send me your addresses.
SAVE THE DATES!!
Personal Bridal shower (Cincinnati)...March 18th
Bachlorette Party (Cincinnati)....April 29th
Does anyone want to help me plan? I cant do this on my own and i would like for my girls to be involved. Email me and let me know if you have any ideas or want to help organize. I am totally at a loss when it comes to really planning anything. Thanks.
Planning on going to Arkansas the last week of January to visit Sarah Craynon. It should be fun if it works out the way i want it to.
I havent been too much in the conversating mood lately. Sorry to those that have to suffer my apathy. Just had a lot on my mind, lotsa work and been really tired.
Anyway, Love you all!!
c.ALIce
Other side of life. Work is going well. Last week I finally got to a point where I was making acceptable progress and money. Hard work none the less, but rewarding with a nice paycheck.
Nat is wonderful
Wedding plans are somewhat stressful. I felt trapped that i had to do it a certain way in order to make everyone happy, once i put that aside and decided what i wanted, its a lot less of a headache. I do need addresses though..everyones!!! so email them to me. (alycepaige@yahoo.com)...I gotta get on the ball with invitation design and getting everything ready. The date is May 20th, reception at cheryls house in monroe, and somewhat of a black tie affair (not prom dresses and tuxedos, but nice dresses and suits)..thats the plan anyway. So please send me your addresses.
SAVE THE DATES!!
Personal Bridal shower (Cincinnati)...March 18th
Bachlorette Party (Cincinnati)....April 29th
Does anyone want to help me plan? I cant do this on my own and i would like for my girls to be involved. Email me and let me know if you have any ideas or want to help organize. I am totally at a loss when it comes to really planning anything. Thanks.
Planning on going to Arkansas the last week of January to visit Sarah Craynon. It should be fun if it works out the way i want it to.
I havent been too much in the conversating mood lately. Sorry to those that have to suffer my apathy. Just had a lot on my mind, lotsa work and been really tired.
Anyway, Love you all!!
c.ALIce
Sunday, January 15, 2006
Oh to be in love
Oh to be in love. How romantic movies have such a different meaning. How life changes, grey always has a shade of blue in it. How did i get so incredibly blessed? What did i ever do in life to have the ultimate priviledge to be loved like i am loved. Its like God made me like a puzzle piece and he made Nat to fit snuggly with me so perfectly. The way he pushes me so gently for me to go towards my goals and dreams. How he is keeps me accountable yet not in a dominating or controlling way. I am sure we have/will have our issues and problems. But who can treat me in such a way where exposing every aspect of myself, good and bad, could feel so safe. I love the way he deals with me, the way he talks to me, the way he gets me to talk, when his sixth sense tells him i really need someone to pull it out. Its like he read the book that is Chrissi, highlighted the most important parts and understood the context. There is no other way to describe it but miraculous.
I wish that I was near you all, that you could witness the truth of the matter. I know that it must be difficult to look in from the outside and not be here to see up close the dynamics of the life we lead. To look from afar and be separate in a sense. I feel as if my entire life has led me to this moment. Every step, struggle and new thought and adventure has bought me to this point in life. Who would I be if i didnt pursue something that i believed in. Would i not still be continuing to run away from my true identity?
What do i want to accomplish in life? What are my true desires? How can one possibly find a partner if they dont have a real idea of who they are? Maybe its not "finding" who you are, maybe its the gift of having the "freedom" to be who you are. For example, I didnt want to bear children or have a family till i met Nat. i was too much of a "free spirit" to stay in one place (especially one as dull as tremont). As a defense i convinced myself of my parental inadequacy. Now, I am somewhat anxious. Its like all teh lies have i been living all the false pretenses i portrayed were erased. Somehow I was free to be me. i didnt have to pretend to be a hardass. I dont know how he did it, but he saved me. He allowed me to be who i was without judgement or assumptions, but with acceptance and support. I guess over time and through my experiences I grew hard that "love" or hope of a future mate could happen. I doubted my worth to be taken care of and loved by any man. I resisted trusting anyone (even those closest to me) becasue it didnt hurt as bad when they rejected my alter ego-that meant my heart was safe-but slowly dying inside. Its strange, sometimes you can get so accustomed to living a lie, it becomes truth. I know what it is like to live a lie. There is a hidden weight there, a burden to carry, most people dont ever realize it. The beauty of it is that when it is gone, there is no denying that its gone. I am living in peace, beauty and security. That is a gift from God. And funny that it is the meaning of his name.
I wish that I was near you all, that you could witness the truth of the matter. I know that it must be difficult to look in from the outside and not be here to see up close the dynamics of the life we lead. To look from afar and be separate in a sense. I feel as if my entire life has led me to this moment. Every step, struggle and new thought and adventure has bought me to this point in life. Who would I be if i didnt pursue something that i believed in. Would i not still be continuing to run away from my true identity?
What do i want to accomplish in life? What are my true desires? How can one possibly find a partner if they dont have a real idea of who they are? Maybe its not "finding" who you are, maybe its the gift of having the "freedom" to be who you are. For example, I didnt want to bear children or have a family till i met Nat. i was too much of a "free spirit" to stay in one place (especially one as dull as tremont). As a defense i convinced myself of my parental inadequacy. Now, I am somewhat anxious. Its like all teh lies have i been living all the false pretenses i portrayed were erased. Somehow I was free to be me. i didnt have to pretend to be a hardass. I dont know how he did it, but he saved me. He allowed me to be who i was without judgement or assumptions, but with acceptance and support. I guess over time and through my experiences I grew hard that "love" or hope of a future mate could happen. I doubted my worth to be taken care of and loved by any man. I resisted trusting anyone (even those closest to me) becasue it didnt hurt as bad when they rejected my alter ego-that meant my heart was safe-but slowly dying inside. Its strange, sometimes you can get so accustomed to living a lie, it becomes truth. I know what it is like to live a lie. There is a hidden weight there, a burden to carry, most people dont ever realize it. The beauty of it is that when it is gone, there is no denying that its gone. I am living in peace, beauty and security. That is a gift from God. And funny that it is the meaning of his name.
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